Let me clarify: I am not Gwyneth Paltrow; we just have a lot of things in common. And I don't necessarily hate her. BUT I do find her annoying. But why?
Here are possible reasons why I shouldn't dislike her, but inevitably do:
1. She looks like this:
I do not look like this. This is one thing Gwyneth and I do not have in common.
2. She has been in a number of wonderful films--my favorite being The Royal Tenenbaums. While I have never been in a Wes Anderson film personally, I would love to be. I was once an aspiring actress myself so that aspect of her career is a very small similarity.
3. If there is one television show I could be on, it would be Glee. And Gwyneth, that skank, is going to be on there this week too! And not only is she going to be on there, she sounds decent and is singing two songs that I think are great. Boooooooo.
4. She is married to this guy:
While Mark looks nothing like Chris Martin, I find him equally as talented. Coldplay is also one of my favorite bands so Gwyneth has the same tastes as I do. She also likes Radiohead. We are one.
5. She runs a blog. I am writing on a blog right now. Her blog is obviously more successful, but I one day aspire to have such a blog...one that offers wonderful tidbits and advice for people's everyday lives. She is all about living, as evidenced by this blog, and that is my mission in life. To live life to the absolute fullest.
So, again, I ask: Why can I absolutely not stand her?
Let's just go with the obvious answer and call it a day...
Pure jealousy.
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